Now, as Jesus would come back, I would say to Him: ‘Dear, my beloved, give me sorrow for my sins, so that, consumed by sorrow and by regret for having offended You, my sins may be erased from my soul, and also from your memory. Yes, give me as much sorrow, for as much as I have dared to offend You. Even more, let sorrow surpass this, so that I may draw more intimately close to You.’
I remember that once, while I was saying this, my always benign Jesus told me: “Since you are so sorry for having offended Me, I myself want to dispose you to feel sorrow for your sins, so that you may see how awful sin is, and what bitter pain my Heart suffered. Therefore, say together with Me: ‘If I cross the sea, You are in the sea, though I do not see You; I tread the earth, and You are under my feet. I sinned’.” And then, in a low voice, almost crying, Jesus added: “Yet I loved you, and at that very moment, I preserved you.” While Jesus was saying this, and I together with Him, I was caught by such sorrow for the offenses given, that I fell flat to the ground; and Jesus disappeared.
Few are those words, but I understood so many things that it is impossible to say all that I comprehended. In the first words I comprehended the immensity, the greatness, the presence of God in each existing thing, such that not even a shadow of our thought can escape Him. I also understood my nothingness compared to a Majesty so great and holy. In the word “I sinned”, I understood the ugliness of sin, the malice, the daring I had had in offending Him. Now, while my soul was considering this, in hearing Jesus Christ say “Yet I loved you, and at that very moment, I preserved you”, my heart was taken by such sorrow, that I felt I was dying, because I could understand the immense love that the Lord had for me in the very act in which I tried to offend Him, and even to kill Him. Ah Lord, how good You have been with me, and I – always ungrateful, and still so bad!